Poems by Tracy Brooks - Tiferet Journal

Tracy Brooks is a lifelong writer. After reaching success with her facebook poetry page, www.facebook.com/soulbeckons, she is now in the process of writing her first book. When not writing,she is busy homeschooling her children, receiving wisdom from her dog, teaching yoga to young people, and offering various spiritual practices to others. www.tracybrookswriter.com

—

I came here as water
in spate being
reverent mists
unreachable depths
eternally dancing
living
flowing
as both a ripple and a swollen ache
calm
yet
never stagnant
consuming in my undercurrents
life-affirming
drizzle to downpour
inexhaustibly giving
surrendering at will
belonging to the beyond
renewing in my flow
stillness as a pause
never ceasing
flow to breath
unstoppable

—

be brave
there is courage in the air
for you are a warrior
even though you’d rather be off watching the sky
not all fighters are on the battlefield
many are gentle ones
holding vessels for the worlds big pain
Tracy
is born out of an unspoken power
what’s in a name
do the roots tangle or nourish?
I believe both are necessary
It’s brave to just believe

—

a haiku on breath–

to breathe so fully
every sense is present
sweet exhalation

—

MAY WE REMEMBER

I would like to let the world
find its way
gently
to a place of possibilities
untethered
paradox of darkness
burning in the light
lately
so many tragedies and destruction of soul
earth holds it all
and she is howling
writhing in pain
inner screeching no longer
beings have been boiled over
and fear is an awful captain
feeling that too many have pulled strings
and tied knots in places and spaces
while so many have been silenced and made small
we are wrought with this unquenchable chaos
born out of deep seated heartache
when so many are silenced
when so many get numb
we are led to the place of forgetting
why we are here
losing sight of any kindred connection
fear morphs into anger
and rage is so much louder
then all the raspy voices
collapsed from trying to be heard
yet
somewhere right this moment
a baby is being born
people are holding one another
souls are taking their last breath here
in love
only love
the sun is creeping up
seeds burst underground
oceans swell with promise
friends are bearing witness
women are dancing
men are singing
children are laughing
dogs are waiting for their humans to walk through the door
there is love
so much love
we are praying and crying
forgiving and trying
and
we
somehow
remember

—

day 28

ask me of the song and I will tell you
what sings to us in the darkness
are we getting to know who we are
when we fall lost
where are we
are we stepping outside of what confines us
or striving too hard to fit in
is what we push out growing us
or draining us
can you hum the tune
do you even recall the sound of your song?

—

day 27
-haiku for Nepal-

God speaks everywhere
in languages no one knows
earth often howls it

—

day 26
-Mamasong-

the voice I heard before arriving
gentle in the tones of a mother’s way
be it singing sweet tunes of finding sunshine
or inquiring what the days desire was
still touches me
the very voice of yesterdays promises
still find their way into my head
you sing still from beyond here
and the melody holds me upright
life is lifted in the humming
your voice is like the forever winds

—

day 25

When the winds caress me
I hold open my tired soul
bowing to the places that Spirit meets me
rain falls down upon me holy
soil pure between my toes
under the fallen purple blooms
God hears me call

—

Poem 24
REFLECTIONS

humbled by the notion
that I can like what I gaze upon
much more fully than early days
I see a sense of wonder in my eyes
a place that has looked beyond
as it helps me to stand in appreciation and loving
towards myself
as my children are always watching
have always caught me and stopped me cold
if the gaze is not loving
what am I teaching?
to enter the relationship with oneself
and allow the imperfections
perhaps to see the cracks as unique etchings
to hold the beauty up differently
nature knows
and to realize that life will show up as beauty
and as wretchedness
as soft as newness and ripe fruit
as rotten as decay and heavy achings
I too hold my beauty and grace
and also my darkness and fear
so now I show up at the mirror as I show up at the yoga mat
awkwardly attempting
ever so tenderly
to love what is.
knowing what is is like the wind
and I am only like water
reflecting what I touch

—

Poem 23
ON BLESSINGS

final sips of coffee
the soft snore of my four legged friend
who has stayed by me for every chapter
not even leaving to chase the ridiculous cat
the way the house is kissed in the early morning sun
makes even the piles seem perfect
strawberries and kisses with the cutest five year old in town
the texts of a man with the purest heart
the teenage pulls in the other room
hints of life way beyond the seen
the way the words want to be danced out of me now
everyday and ordinary blessings surround me
thankful breathing
grateful movement
may I hold it softly
always

—

Clumsy Cento

Makes me smile at the thought
Considering my life
fragmented wholeness
where worries hunt
I left long ago, from all such occasions
I never liked rules…
splashed over me Holy
maybe it’s not about understanding
I am smudged and dappled
It’s refreshing like stretching out
embrace each part of me

—

what gives me comfort
is the way the earth holds me
the way my body breathes me
the eyes of a partner who has rode the waters
alongside me

what gives me comfort
is the way my pup greets me
every dawn
as if the day was perfect
just as it is

what gives me comfort
is the way I watch my children
question everything
as it tells me seeds are deeply planted
and when my time is up
it all still continues

what gives me comfort
is the whispers of those that have already left
this earth walk
for they let me know it only gets better

what gives me comfort
is letting words spill out of me
from the deeper spaces
and hungry places

—

The very first book I fell in love with
still resides nearby
I recall ever so sweetly
Caroline and all her animal friends
became my friends
daily we would recreate the adventures
the travels
the magic
the treasures
vivid are they still
in my heart and in my bones
Gratitude swirls deep every time I turn these tattered pages

—

The hurrier I go the behinder I get

Sequence

Let go or be dragged

Sorry

Cut away dead wood

Connect four

Bless this mess

Clue

Be nice or leave

Monopoly

Practice makes practice

Scrabble

Trust the earth

Party Box

Be love

—

WALKING WITHIN MYSELF

contrary place we all sit with
layers of skin we peel
boundaries adjusted
something had to give

water is hard to grab onto
flesh is harder still
emotions will hide
something had to take

my younger self was not as brave
my older me is not as confined
bittersweet integration
something has to change

I tried to carry yesterday
I asked to hold today
the two disagreed like stubborn children
something had to fall

I stand upon the wayward spots
I ask the bones to lead
my emptiness confounds me
something has to leap

—

Do not hold on to anything.
Embrace the moments you walk through, the people you connect with, yet do not grasp.
Allow all of this unsettled life to run through you, trying not to pause any place too long.
Do not collect too many wishes, let the sweet intentions pulse out of you daily.
Holding on too hard may make your blinders pinch you,
and you will not be able to see what is.
Clinging to the what happened stops us from walking on.
We are not meant to stay stagnant, this life is the journey to embrace change.
Let go. Like the winds upon the water, trusting the flow of it.
Release the need to carry judgements, in yourself and others.
Do not carry around the weight of worry,or let guilt be kept beside you.
Do not cling tightly, even to love.
Love is meant to be walked with sweetly, tended to gently,
given away freely.
Do not hold on.

—

Listen to the silence, in between the pause
of what is said, of what you breathe,
of what you struggle with —
here lie the the breadcrumbs,
the clearing,
the beaten paths of forgotten mornings—
recall the way the early light showed you
what it was like to move freely,
before the afternoon gave rise to the regrets
and ruminations.

—

Teacher moves away

I reach to offer embrace

Some wise ones hold walls

—

DON’T WAIT HERE

think before you speak

wait before you act

look both ways before you cross the street

breathe before you react

so helpful is the pause

yet

when you write

you must let the words be impulsive

the fire have its time

otherwise what is the use of your story?

people want to feel something

need to move through the waters with you

diving deep enough to uncover something for themselves,

of themselves

the days I didn’t pause the pen

when I wrote because I had to

let out the caged and pent up creature

that resides within us all

no fear of it devouring

anything but my own bullshit

let it lead me to my prey

those are the only pages worth saving

hesitation has no place here

trusting the bones

letting out the story deep within

these are the ways

we birth our healings

and invite others to own their voice

—

I see my beauty in you

and in your laughter

my happiness becomes bigger

than any place on earth

I feel my heartbeat

matches the breath

of the universe

rise and fall

beat by beat

I sense my longings

in the way you move

recalling dreams

every time you speak aloud

I taste forever

when you are near me

knowing all we are

is just a part

I see my beauty in you

and it calls me

in the purest voice I know

—

AS THE UNIVERSE SMILES

I breathe more deeply since you walked on

simply because you are the air

I love larger now

for you left me part of your heart

I am surrounded in the shelterings of many lifetimes

as letting you go

meant ripening deeply

unto the sways

of all you brought forth

I wonder out loud these days

for you whisper of secrets

that I am finally able to decipher

who knew that the ending

was just the unfolding

and in the release of your garments

we would be even closer

cradle me softly

as the sky paints with you

sing me to sleep

in the ways of the wind

awaken me fully

as the dawn creeps back

and in the laughter of the children

you are felt

for you are the universe now

and your smile guides me

home is here

—

I’m still collecting ideas of me

threads of connections

ways of moving in the world

forgotten nuances

of long ago longings

still gathering

courage to put them in some form

revisiting conversations

of long ago

I’m still collecting up some pieces

of things that life pushed aside

saving the fragments

of the me that sat too close the back edge

and in my quest to make enough room

for too many other things

I felt myself break apart

now rallying up the forgotten

the hushed

the whispered

I’m still collecting

sweet forgiveness

in the glued together shards

holding it softly

ready to pour it upon myself

or give it away gently

I am still collecting emptiness

the kind that sets one free

realizing that clinging too tightly

to any thing I find

must be allowed to fall away

—

Ode to a friend ~ daily resurrection

I see the many ways pain tried to take him

he wears it on his gait

yet the glimmer in his eyes

make me feel he is not daunted

I hear the way his voice cracks when

memory charges in

then he switches to a laughter

that makes me bittersweet

for in this strangers smile

I found a remembered friend

I know he is not who the gaze presented

yet from the far corners

it as if my Dad has come back

When I listened to his story

I felt a reverence in the bones

here was a once addicted soul

that died unto the numbing life

held his hurts

bandaged the wounds

and traveled on

gathering wounded soldiers

helping them fight their wars

and in the ordinary bend

of an everyday man

I felt he was resurrected

dead to the old bottle’s call

as he cast off the need to numb

he summoned the strength to dive deep

and when he came up for air

he brought the drowning with him

he no longer falls from intoxication

yet he surrenders his ways to his mat

kindness speaks with a raspy voice

wisdom looks through the lines

I think I found my hero

for he reminds me to keep showing up

in the ways he has outran the monster

he lets the decaying roll away

that is born again

my friend

—

I honor my own becomings

as I gaze upon the moon

bidding bittersweet farewell to what has come to its final space

Lady Moon cradles the endings

and ushers in the next wave

She knows me from before this life

has watched me come and go

She always offers wisdom

and meets me where I am

I have come to trust

her glow of another world

subtle secrets

powerful feminine voices

of years that passed

and the unbounded gifts

of letting her shine into my soul

we will walk eternal pathways

she will guide me through this life

quietly reminding me

of my voice

of forgotten places

of the vastness

She shares because

she has been there

and offers it all up to the eternal knowings

—

The Exodus within

Seldom do we find

an earth bound being

who has not been forced to depart

some place

of confinement

be it from a temporary abode

a primordial womb

or a way of being that no longer fits

in small ways

we are wrought with

ways we must change

leaning to the sun

casting off the casings

departing the safe nests our mind built

when we leave

try always

take all of the beings

that have inhabited the caves underneath

in the movement

may we be study enough to carry the broken parts of ourselves

then we need not return

yet if we must go back to the abandoned cells

may we scrape off a fragment of the broken parts we rescue

and bury it deeply

allowing what once was only heartache

to be transformed

seeds of our soul

deeper into the moist darkness of what was

nourished by what is

cracked open

trusting the exodus within

—

I want to say

we are all here for the journey

climbing solitary walls

but swimming in the same river

I want to say

we each are guided by a hundred unnamed angels

that nature will answer almost any question that burns

for the earth is not timid

and the wind believes

you will find your answers

I want to say

that every being comes to share its lone soul

to bare it in the ways

that speak freely

that each time we fall to our knees

we are lifted

the sacred and the mundane are forever friends

the good byes of this life

are but a gentle nudge

to understanding the infinite pulls

to summoning the benevolent courage

this walk on earth requires

I want to say that we are bigger than this life

so when the shed is final

we come to the dance of the beyond

and like the sky

we are everywhere

—

Bow to the Process
-(inspired by “The Woodcarver” and creating very first book)
Pacing in the confines of everyday

I return to a much simpler call

Here I am

emptied

unencumbered

freed

untethered

allowing whatever arises

remembering where the stirrings reside

trusting to share would be giving

Meeting what is

sensing what was

looking pain in her eyes

calling on the joy of this life

letting them speak

not interrupting

knowing Spirit is with us

Bravely becoming a gentler presence

stepping softly

into the bones

among the ashes

and

not turning away

the unformed

unnamed

unclaimed

letting the connections

untangle

No longer pulled by the outcome

just sweetly held open by the process

I bow