Saying goodbye to my mother is the first memory I have. Dad said she was sick and had to go away for awhile. I was only three years old and didn’t understand. She looked sad and despondent, but I hugged and kissed her anyway as my dad instructed.
That was the last and only time I remember seeing her. She was beautiful. Long dark hair, big brown eyes, big bosom to lay my head in for comfort. Everything else I know is through stories and pictures.
“She smiled a lot and was fun-loving. She loved to be outside and to walk in the rain”, her good friend Sandy told me. “I sensed her smile was a front at times, but she always looked for the good in people and the world.”
Why she left the planet so soon our family will never know for sure but I miss her everyday. I often wonder how my life might have been if she were still here. Would I have a different perspective or would the struggles and outcomes be the same. Would my Dad and sisters be any different? I believe at the core, no because we all have our own unique personalities, but yes because we all missed out on the nurturing and family ties that only a mother holds together.
Despite this huge loss, I try my hardest to make the best of each day I am given and to be a nurturer to others. I believe God puts people and animals in my path each day to remind my that I am loved, worthy and whole.
Love you and miss you Mom. Can’t wait to see you again in heaven and I’ll always think of you when walking in the rain.
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